Friday, January 13, 2012

Greatest Weakness

Took these from some Reddit thread.

What's the best answer you've ever given in a job interview to the question: "What is your biggest weakness?"

A few years ago I was applying to work for a middleschool in PA and had this conversation:
Q: "What's your greatest weakness?"
A: "I'm just a little bit too attracted to teenage girls."
Q" ..."
A: "Just kidding! It's actually that I don't know when a joke is inappropriate."

Me: I'd say my biggest weakness is distinguishing between fact and fiction, reality and fantasy.
Interviewer: And your biggest strength?
Me: I'm Batman.

My friends tell me I am condescending. Condescending is when you talk down to people.

"Cookie dough ice cream."

"I'd say my biggest weakness is that I work too hard. Also, I steal staplers....... hey, is that a Swingline?"

One applicant once told me, with a straight face, that his biggest weakness was upper body strength, but he'd been going to the gym, so that should qualify him..."

Bullets. Definitely gonna have to go with bullets on this one, Bob.
BULLETS! My only weakness...

That I am unemployed.

"Singing, definitely singing, but I promise if I work here I won't sing, so it's all good."

"Stairs." People don't know if it's okay to laugh at cripple jokes from a cripple, it's hilarious.

When asked that question by my third interviewer, I took a deep sigh and said "Well I'm addicted to heroin, and some employers have a hard time understanding that work will always take a back seat to that."

Print a business card that says "Sometimes my overpreparedness comes across as arrogance."  Hand it to the interviewer when asked.

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